two pink lines.

(Warning....not a happy post. Kinda a downer but in a reflective kind of way.)


They say (you know, they) that once you become a parent, you worry about everything.

But, what they don't tell you is that the worries don't start when the baby is born.  The worrying starts when you see two pink lines.

The first worry is "is this REAL? is "it" going to stick?" and you keep testing to see those lines.  Then you worry about hearing a heartbeat, prenatal testing, feeling the baby move, so on. So forth.  The worry.

This past week has been terrible for unborn babies and their worrying moms.  In 7 days, four women I know, have suffered losses, all at different stages of pregnancy.

On the same day that one woman (ahem) announced her "BFP" to her online mommies group, another expecting mom lost her baby at 6 weeks, after a year of trying and a medical diagnosis indicating, that yes, indeed, conceiving would be a challenge.

Three days later, the newly pregnant women (ahem) had to announce that it was a "chemical pregnancy" - a very early miscarriage.  Semantics, terminology and the biological stage of pregnancy try to take away from the fact that for three days, that woman was indeed pregnant.

Several days later, yet another mom announced her loss to this group and days later, one more loss announcement.  One mom with a history of miscarriages and the other, a surrogate mom (and very very close friend of mine) to two expectant daddies.

Seven days.  Four babies.  And nothing in common except for the hope of a healthy life and the worry that you will lose it.  "It" being hope.

Or the baby.

Or both.

Politically, this is the hot button, "let's not go there at a dinner party" debate.

But, for a mother wanting a baby (or a surrogate giving up her body for another family), the question of when life - and the worry -  begins is never doubted.

may your dreams stay big
and your worries stay small.